the girl behind the backpack

You’re scared.

You’re lonely.

You’re confused.

You’re angry.

You’re losing loved ones.

You’re living through a Global Pandemic.

It’s alright to feel like shit. 

No one is handling it better, don’t compare your emotional health with their Instagram story. There is no simple way to ‘handle’ this.

I read an important quote (sadly don’t remember the author) but it was basically that you do not have to leave quarantine any different to how you started. Being you is perfectly fine. If you want to lose/gain weight, great. If you don’t, also great. If you want to learn a new skill, awesome. If you don’t, also awesome. If you want to finish the entire series of Tiger King, in a day, sick. If you don’t, also sick.

I think you get my drift here.

What you see on Instagram/Facebook/Twitter/YouTube is literally specifically staged moments of their day. They chose to share that with you. They didn’t choose the moments they were frightened or exhausted. But it doesn’t mean they don’t have them.

Find out what works for you, because even though we don’t know when this will end, you can still find your own pace. Some advice people offer may not work for you, other advice may. For instance, before quarantine, I never woke up early if I didn’t have to (and sometimes when I had to, oops) so getting up and going for a run early is definitely not going to happen. But waking up late, having a nice lunch, then doing my work late in the evening suits me well. Don’t change who you are because you feel it looks more productive, you’re the only person who knows how you work, stick with it.

One thing that has really worked for me is having projects. I sound so old, but focusing on projects, making mountains of to-do lists, tracking budgets, even listing the tv shows I want to watch, makes me feel like I’ve achieved something. When in reality I’ve spent 3 days on my arse watching The Suite Life on Deck and only got up to tick the box. Who cares? Who actually cares? As long as you’re doing your best, where can you go wrong?

You know what I’m going to do tomorrow?

• Sleep till at least 12
• Paint my skirting board
• Go through my clothes
• Start some uni work
• Play Sims 4
• Watch Our Girl or Brooklyn 99

and if I don’t? Who cares?

I know it’s a bit of a different blog, but I thought it was important. We are going to get through this. For now, check on loved ones and do your best. Thank you to any essential worker right now, thank you to anyone continuing to work their arses off, thank you for reading and stay safe.